Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Relative Joys

Sciaticus Maximus. No, not the name of a despotic Roman Emperor. It is the condition that has kept me from my computer lo, these many days. This is my third tango with a condition that literally kicks my butt to the curb. For those unfamiliar with it, sciatica is neuralgia of the hip and thigh. It is a very painful, debilitating all-out attack on the sciatic nerve--the largest nerve in the body. You cannot sit, stand, or recline comfortably for more than five minutes at a time. It's like having rabid free-range knitting needles playing tug-o-war up and down the leg. Every attempt to walk results in an Oscar-winning portrayal of Quasimodo. Step aside, Lon Chaney, Lord Wellbourne's on the move!

Most of my Gentle Readers will remember that my cyber nerve center is housed within my studio. The studio is located in the basement. There is a stairway consisting of 14 foot treads. With this condition they may just as well have been 14 bear traps. So close and yet so far. Cut off from the outside world by three days of continual snow, pernicious sciatica, and blog-withdrawal, I found myself enjoying a gondola ride through the canals of my own mental Venice. Here are several postcards depicting the virtual highlights down the lazy river.

1) Admiring the Celestial Confectioner sprinkling every branch and twig with a fine coating of icy sweetness.

2) Discovering a cousin I didn't know existed and with whom I am enjoying a happy pen-pal relationship.

3) Joyously hearing from a beloved Gentle Reader whose absence and silence left me feeling curiously lonesome.

4) Watching the avenging sun stealthily peeping through the clouds to liberate the pine trees from their burdens of snow-cone oppression.

5) Completing several commissions in record time because I couldn't remember where I'd put the remote .

6) Amusement in watching my mother embrace the role-reversal of caretaker during my incapacitation.

7) Finally being able to negotiate the stairway and return to the land of the enlightened. (Cue the heavenly choir and sunbeam machine)

In regards to #6, I have been remiss in not informing my Gentle Readers that my soon-to-be 92 year-old mother came through her surgery for colon cancer with flying colours and has reaffirmed her tenacity for life. Other than the anticipated discomfiture she is doing very well and her prognosis is stellar. She has been home for two weeks now and we have struck such a harmonic balance that it actually rather alarms me. Being of a reclusive and artistic bent I do not do well with close cohabitation. But I have found it rather pleasant to have companionable conversation at different times throughout the day. I have also become a rather accomplished short-order cook. She cannot eat very much in one sitting so it is necessary to provide several smaller 'noshettes' throughout the day. Her appetite is still voracious so I'm getting to spread my culinary wings in wild abandon.

I want to assure the Gentle Writers who I follow that I will catch up on my reading and comment where I feel inspired to do so. I have greatly missed you all and appreciate your visiting during my sciatic sabbatical. I commented at Ageing Gratefully yesterday to dear June, that there is no chasm of space and time between friends that words cannot bridge. That off-the-cuff remark stayed with me throughout the day and, while writing this, reiterated itself. I am grateful for each and every one of you.


  1. I truly enjoy reading what's going on up there in the frozen's 75 here today. lol
    Glad to hear Mom is doing so well, please give her my love and share a hug so you both get one from me.

  2. HUGS x Thermacare wraps x LOVE

  3. Lady H--I can't even remember what 75 degrees feels like! I will pass on your kind wishes to HRH.

    Red--equals a very potent remedy. Thanks!

  4. Well we missed you too, even got to the point of looking out your email address when up popped your first post in a week.Relief! You are still with us,HRH is doing fine and now you tell us the sciatica is under control,good news.
    Life has it's moments,being cut off from our creative sanctuary is one of the worst!!
    Welcome back!

  5. Awww. Shucks, LW, I missed you awful too.

    Sciatica's amazing in its onslaught, isn't it?
    I recall having a not-so-severe-as-yours bout of it years ago, and having to inch my way down the hall to the elevator at work with my back pressed against the wall. Sideways motion worked; forward not so much. It goes when it will...I'm glad yours left when it did.

    I think your mother probably felt better taking care of you than if she had had to think too much about her own recovery.

    You are such a poet.

  6. I am grateful for your contribution to Blogland, as a kindred spirit of the highest degree...

    .. good wishes for good health to you both...

    Do you think you may move your studio or part thereof up to the main domain?

  7. Von--Please, feel free to email me if you should ever have the inclination to do so. I will warn you in advance, however,that I am just as verbose in emails as I am here. It is kind of you to have been concerned.

    June--I believe this latest hostile take-over had the added bonus of perfecting the crab-walk. I have to say that watching my mother trying to balance a plate of something while navigating with a walker was wonderful. The look on her face was priceless when she reached her destination--total triumph. The need to feel useful is a commodity we all too often take for granted in the elderly. The 'poet' thing--when I was 16 or so, besides wanting to be the greatest living American Shakespearean actor of my generation, my other ambition was to be my generation's Lord Byron. Thanks for the nod.

    Gwen--Thank you most sincerely for your kind words and wishes! It is high praise from one who maintains such an ethereal blog as yours is.

    I have thought about going 'global' but I am hindered by a combination of ignorance and dread. I don't know where to start and I dislike the idea of being 'beholden' to the computer. I participate in local Fairs and craft shows now and really enjoy the personal touch. Profit isn't a motivation for me but I would like to share my talents on a broader spectrum. It is an artistic oxymoronism.