Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Lord Wellbourne Vents!!

In future I would like the following descriptive adjectives removed from references to myself. They are: 'dependable', 'reliable', and 'personable'. Let me assure my Gentle Readers that these words will continue to define aspects of my personality--just a little less pronounced.

It has become apparent to me that the above words are the preliminary requirements for a more nefarious and highly incorrect, totally bastardized adjective: 'takeforgrantedability'. I have always made an effort to develop a rapport with employees and staff members wherever I conduct business--banks, restaurants, shops, etc... I don't know if familiarity breeds contempt but it certainly spawns rudeness.

A cashier in the grocery store today invited the lady behind me to step ahead since she only had a few items compared to my half-filled cart. Looking me straight in the eye, grinning broadly, she said: "It's okay, dear, he won't mind. He's such a nice guy." I most certainly DID mind. I would like to have been offered the option of playing Sir Lancelot rather than the condescending role of 'personable' push-over. Once the shopper had moved on-- warmly thanking the cashier and ignoring me--the cashier offered: "I knew you wouldn't mind. I've seen you do it so often for other people." Perfectly true. Still not an excuse for deciding my place in the pecking order.

I never promise anything--ever. The words "I promise..." should never be used in passing or flippantly tossed off the tongue. It signifies a verbal contract that to me has the same gravity of obligation a handshake used to have. Instead, I prefer using the phrase "I'll do my best". And I always do. That being said, I have been called upon by numerous family members, friends, and neighbours to promise participation in various activities; either as a solo act or in conjunction with others. "We know we can depend on you". "We can't take a risk on a stranger when we know how reliable you are". I'm assuming this is all due to the full page Op-Ed piece my evil twin wrote in the local paper announcing my illustrious propensity for impersonating a doormat.

I would certainly like to think that I am, indeed, a nice guy. I don't really mind having those endearing adjectives attached to me--as long as the respect and courtesy those adjectives should call into play are applied. Otherwise.....the party you are calling is no longer in service....


  1. Oh Dear!Treated like a doormat and rudely taken for granted, I thoroughly understand your rebellion and endorse your proposed actions.Just be thankful you're not also female and about to reach the age of invisibility or perhaps in some ways it might be better.I can see grumpiness coming on in this rude,disrespectful world we live in.It's so hard sometimes not to be grumpy in the face of the lack of compassion or empathy that seems to be all around us.Makes you want to pull up the drawbridge and bolt the door doesn't it?

  2. You sound a really nice guy, one of those nowadays rare creatures, nature's true gentlemen. That is a compliment and an appreciation.
    Stay that way, I am sure it does not mean you are being taken for granted.

    I just saw your comment at Aging Gratefully and thought I'd come over and offer to translate any of those German phrases you find difficult to understand. They are NOT untranslateable, that only goes for poetry.
    The latter fact often makes my heart break, but there you go.

  3. Me again, we have family living at Manchsester, Ma.

  4. Von: It isn't very often that I'm taken for granted which is why it stands out so when it does. By nature I am something of a curmudgeon--too much education and too little patience--although I am relearning to take things less to heart now that I'm back in Maine. Drawbridge up, door bolted, free-range crocs in the moat!

    Friko: Welcome Liebling! I have often read your comments and appreciated your thoughts. Thank you for your kind thoughts and words. I hear what you say about the German poets--so much of Goethe's heart and meaning is lost in many translations. :-( Do please come again!

  5. Free-range crocs: We have some of those down here. It's a cottage industry gone amuck. And I beg to differ, you have been taken for granted quite often.Living in Humble, you had every stray at your door at any and all hours! Drove me nuts! It's just a shame you had to move to the boons to get some peace :-( **HUGS** That lady at the grocery store is a step closer to meeting your evil twin. Mwuahahahaha...

  6. I love you, Red.
    I don't think little missy will ever invite other people to cut in front of me again. Apparently I have a look that says things whether I'm thinking them or not. My eyebrow has a life of its own, evidently.

  7. As vents go, this is elegantly restrained.
    Nip that personable pushover persona in the bud!
    Nip it!
    The raised eyebrow speaks volumes to those who are attuned. Should the little missy require a verbal reprimand, please try to recall every word and relate it here.

  8. Will do....I have an excellent memory. Gets in the way sometime but is a bonus most of the time.

  9. That eyebrow is ninja fast in reprimand. Brrr!

  10. I have had to live with this eyebrow doing it's own thing since I was a child. I think it's more evolved than the rest of me. It can anticipate stupidity a good 10 seconds before my ears and mind perceive it.